When suffering has no fix, and when we long for healing for ourselves and others, it can be difficult to know what to pray and how. As Christians, there is often a sincere desire to pray for those living with chronic pain or disabilities, people like me. Prayer can be both very comforting and very complicated. How we pray, and the assumptions we hold about healing, can shape how those prayers are received by the people we hope to comfort.

Born with disabilities

To give you some context about my life and journey as someone with a disability, I was born with bilateral talipes equinovarus, also known as clubfoot. I was also born with a cataract in my left eye that went untreated, resulting in significantly diminished sight from that eye. Growing up, I also had a history of concussions and various other health issues. Therefore, I am used to people praying for my health, and while it is usually appreciated, it can sometimes be a source of discomfort and make me feel not fully accepted for who I am. 

I once worked at a summer camp, and each week, someone on staff would pray for my feet to “return to how God wants them.” This made me feel like I was innately broken and that my body was wrong. In her book My Body is Not a Prayer Request, Amy Kenny describes this feeling: “This is what it is like to be disabled in an ableist world. We are erased from a society that never wanted us around and continues to use extreme measures to cure us instead of accepting us as we are.” Though provocative, this highlights an important issue when it comes to praying for those with disabilities and chronic illnesses: while many of us have accepted our bodies as they are and embraced the beauty in our differences, the world—and sometimes the church—wants to ‘cure’ or ‘fix’ us rather than accept that we are fearfully and wonderfully made in God's image, just as any other person is also made in the image of God.

To have a disability is not to be lesser than those with able bodies; rather, we are those with insights into the brokenness of the world. We face pain and accept our bodies despite the brokenness we sometimes feel. The question remains: how do we pray for those with disabilities in a way that honors them as people made in God's own image? 

How to pray for people with disabilities

Perhaps the most important way to pray for someone with disabilities is to do so in the same way we would pray for anyone else. No matter who we are, we all have strengths and hopes, and experience pain and worry. Just as you might pray for a friend going through a difficult time—praying for healing of the heart or for comfort—you can also pray to empower and encourage them. 

When praying for someone with a disability, always begin by asking what they would like you to pray for. Only pray for someone’s disability if they specifically ask you to do so. Presuming that someone wants a disability healed can feel hurtful, especially when that person has come to terms with their physical body and may even have grown to love their body despite its differences. A key aspect often missed in prayers for those with disabilities is asking God to empower them to serve others in our communities and to be a light to the world on equal footing.

People with disabilities don’t need to be fixed

Too often, people see those with disabilities in our community as projects to fix, or worse, as individuals too helpless to serve. When you pray for someone with a disability, consider if your prayer is shaped more by your own discomfort or by a true desire to see the person in front of you flourish. While most Christians never intend to diminish anyone, treating people with disabilities as someone who needs to be served can undermine the wonderful plans God has for his children who are differently abled to serve. Rather than praying something like “Lord, please heal this person's body so that they may do your work,” you might pray, “Lord, we pray that this person may find wonderful and creative ways to serve you in ways only they can.” By framing our prayers this way, we honor the image of God in people with disabilities, acknowledging that God has made them in his image despite their disabilities and that they, too, have the capability and calling to serve the church community and beyond. 

There are times when people with disabilities will indeed want prayers for healing, but in knowing this, we must also make room for lament, as there are many who will not see their bodies redeemed in this lifetime. Healed or not, these people are not projects for us to fix but are simply our brothers and sisters in Christ. It takes time and trust for someone with a disability to open up and express any sadness they feel about their body without fear of people trying to fix them, and we must give space for lamenting the same way we would for anyone who grieves. It is our role as the body of Christ to make room for lament, but also for encouraging people with disabilities to serve the community, church, and God, as it is equally God’s call for both the able-bodied and those who are differently abled.

Bible passages for reflection and prayer

Then Jesus said to his host, “When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or sisters, your relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous (Luke 14:12-14).

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights (Habakkuk 3:17-19). 

A prayer for someone with disabilities

Join us in prayer.

Lord God, Heavenly Father, 

We pray that as we seek how to honor and uplift those in your kingdom whose bodies differ from ours, may we see your light in them. We pray that we may have ears to listen patiently, and lips that speak blessings and encouragement to those who may have previously been left aside.

We pray that you would enable those with disabilities to serve effectively and to lead wherever you call them. Give us willing and humble hearts to be led by and to learn from them. Teach us how to listen well, recognizing that they may know and reflect aspects of your love that we may never have experienced personally. 

Lord, guide us as we pray for those with disabilities to help us honor them and to lift them up as we would all your children.

Lord, guide us and give us wisdom, in Jesus’ name. Amen