No one likes to feel helpless. We hate the idea of not being able to take action in a situation, to “do something” to help someone who is sick, hurt, or in trouble in some way. Even more, we hate the idea of being unable to help ourselves or having to depend on someone else. Yet, we often feel helpless in our daily lives, incapable of taking meaningful action for ourselves or someone else. We might even say, “All I can do is pray,” as if prayer is just something we say without thinking about it because it isn't doing much. But in our helplessness, prayer may be the best and most productive way to “do something.” If we can pray, we are, in fact, not helpless but capable of doing the very best thing we can do, the thing we ought to do whether we can “do something” tangible or not.

Accepting our helplessness

I once heard a story on Christian radio about underfunded, poorly staffed orphanages in another country. The report stated that social and economic issues had created a dire situation of neglect and abandonment. The orphanages couldn’t keep up and could only meet children’s most basic needs. Workers, for example, were so overstretched that they could only give infants attention when feeding or diapering. The babies sat in their cribs all day with little interaction with adults. Hearing this, I felt overwhelmingly helpless. Driving down the highway, I wept at the wheel.

Looking back, I believe the Holy Spirit spoke to me that day about helplessness. There were children in a terrible situation, and I could physically do nothing. Oh sure, I could have found a charity to send money to, or I could have gone home and convinced my wife that we needed to adopt a baby from that country. But what I believe the Spirit wanted me to see that day was that there really was nothing substantial I could do; my bank account was virtually empty, and that meant I would neither be sending money nor adopting a baby any time soon. I felt so helpless I yelled, “God, do something!” At that moment, I realized that I had done the one thing I could do in that situation: I prayed. For the rest of the drive, I poured out my feelings to God, asking our Father in Heaven to rescue those little children. I had to accept my helplessness, let go of any thoughts of taking control, and trust God with the outcome. By admitting my helplessness, I was not admitting a personal flaw. It is not a sin to feel helpless; instead, by confessing my helplessness, I stated a simple fact: I could do nothing to change the situation, but God could.

Trusting God in our helplessness

That experience brought me in touch with my helplessness. I learned that I could let go of my self-sufficiency and trust God with my inability to “do something.” It was a timely lesson because I feel helpless all the time. My brother died of a strange infection. I felt completely helpless. Another relative has been diagnosed with cancer. I feel helpless. There’s another school shooting in the news. Helpless. And it goes on. When I feel helpless, I have to trust God to take appropriate action…and I don’t get to say, or maybe even know, what is appropriate.

In Psalm 10, the psalmist beseeches the Lord to come to the aid of those who cannot help themselves: "Arise, Lord! Lift up your hand, O God. Do not forget the helpless" (v.12). The psalmist bases his plea entirely on who God is, “The Lord is King for ever and ever” (v.16), and trusts that God will act on behalf of the helpless. “You, Lord, hear the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, so that mere earthly mortals will never again strike terror” (vv.17-18). Later, the apostle Paul recognizes the power of Christ in his helplessness and weakness: “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). Like the psalmist and Paul, we need to trust God in our helplessness, seeing it as strength, not weakness.

That’s what I had to do about those orphanages in that other country. I didn’t know what God would do, but I had to give up all striving on my part and trust God would do what was needed. I believe that he did, though I may never know what that was.

Turning our helplessness into prayer

One way to deal with our feelings of helplessness is to speak that feeling out loud to God. “Holy Father, I feel helpless in this situation.” “God, I do not know what to do.” We can ask God to do what we can’t do. “Lord, you are God; you know what needs to be done.” In the book of Mark, a father felt completely helpless for his son, who was afflicted by an evil spirit:

When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the boy into a convulsion…. Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?” “From childhood,” he answered. “...But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” “‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.” Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” [Jesus] rebuked the impure spirit. “You deaf and mute spirit,” he said, “I command you, come out of him and never enter him again” (Mark 9:20-25).

That father admitted his helplessness to Jesus, asking the Lord to help him overcome his instinct to hold control in his own hands, “Help me overcome my unbelief!” When we acknowledge our helplessness to God, the Holy Spirit comforts us and turns our unbelief into belief. As we turn our helplessness over to God, the Spirit may show us what to pray for in that situation. He may even show us more tangible things we can do.

We don’t like feeling helpless. And we have a hard time accepting the helplessness of others. We get irritated when someone says their “thoughts and prayers” are with someone who has suffered tragedy. Sometimes, those “thoughts and prayers” are empty words, but for many, they’re not empty; they convey a confession of helplessness in the situation. “I’m going to pray because that is all I can do.” When we deride that confession, we ridicule the best thing someone can do: pray. In our vulnerability and helplessness, we can lean into God’s sufficiency to deal with any situation. Our helplessness is far from a flaw; we are human, after all. When we voice our helplessness to God, we give up our self-sufficiency to rely on him. In praying, we find that we are not helpless at all; we’re doing the best thing we can do.

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